Hoda Kotb broke down her decision to split from longtime partner Joel Schiffman in her new book.
“Our decision to part wasn’t one that we took lightly, but we knew it was the right one,” Kotb, 61, wrote in Jump and Find Joy: Embracing Change in Every Season of Life, which was released on Tuesday, September 23. “It came from a place of love, not anger, which makes a big difference.”
Kotb and Schiffman, 67, started dating in 2013, waiting two years before taking their relationship public. A year into their relationship, Kotb told Schiffman that she wanted to “explore adoption” with him.
“Joel looked me in the eye, and without blinking, replied, ‘I don’t need a minute, and the answer is yes.’ I literally fell onto his chest and wept,” she wrote. “I sobbed, my tears a huge release of relief and gratitude. It was one of the first times I said the word ‘adoption’ out loud.”
The two adopted daughters Haley Joy, now 8, and Hope Catherine, now 6.They were together for nearly a decade when Today viewers noticed that Kotb wasn’t wearing her engagement ring. She announced their split during a January 2022 broadcast.
“There was no cheating, no scandal, no big crisis. It sounds cliché, but truth is, we were just growing apart,” she wrote. “There wasn’t the drama you hear about in all the great country songs. The no-good, two-timing, whiskey-loving heartbreakers. It simply wasn’t us.”
Schiffman proposed to Kotb in November 2019. The former Today host wrote that their wedding plans were put “on hold” during the Covid-19 pandemic in 2020.
“I guess it just seemed strange to some folks that Joel and I skipped past the marriage and divorce part and went straight to the great friends and coparent’s part,” Kotb shared in the book. “But when you care about someone the way we care about each other, it’s easy. We want the best for one another and our girls. Joel’s a great guy, a great dad, and a great friend.”
Hoda Kotb isn’t letting breakups stand in the way of enjoying herself and finding love again. “Life is beautiful. Try things, go out, get out of your house and your apartment,” Kotb told Entertainment Tonight in March 2024. “I feel like life is meant to be experienced and [you should] step out into it. I […]
While there was nothing “wrong” in Kotb’s relationship with Schiffman, she wrote that things didn’t “feel 100 percent right” either.
“I think when your partner is nice and there’s chemistry, it’s easy to overlook that you’ve been cruising along on different paths,” Kotb explained. “But when you decide to take a good look and compare road maps … you can’t avoid the truth.”
Jump and Find Joy is out now.
